Last dance in Copenhagen

Tivoli Bloom Festival

Tivoli Gardens Amusement park is busy being decked-out for the Bloom Festival this weekend

We’re shocked that the day has arrived so quickly, but here we are on our last day in Denmark. It’s been an amazing two weeks, and we have already started planning our return to explore more Danish provinces like Jutland, Faroe Islands, Greenland, and Funen. Oh yeah and also Bornholm! A bike adventure will almost certainly be involved.

We have really appreciated the Danish culture and approach to life! There’s an emphasis on equality that permeates many things here. People can speak their minds, and there is a priority placed on all modes of transportation. The Danes are a lovely people, and their cultural heritage and history are both available and fun to explore. The country is beautiful.

We have had a very lucky run of our trip to Denmark and Sweden. From landing here in the capital of Denmark in the middle of pride AND a global triathlon competition through travelling around the entire boundary of the Øresund through the gardens of Sweden. In typical Huffowicz-fashion, we ended up ringing around an entire body of water to wind up back where we started. It’s a great way to end our trips and to reflect on the experience that we’ve had together.

Right now we are sitting on the rooftop of our hotel, eating free snacks, having drinks, and talking about our trip. Ok, also I’m writing this blog in the lulls. The citizens of Copenhagen below are on their bicycles, whizzing down the bike lanes. They are walking the streets with their shopping or chatting with friends. They are driving their well cared-for vehicles here and there. The city has a sort of flow, and it’s very interesting to sit up here and watch the ballet dance of the city streets.

Tonight we will head over to Tivoli for one last time (you know, before we come back here and go there again). We’re planning on visiting the Tivoli food hall for dinner and walking under the lights, before coming back here to the hotel for an early bed time. Our flight leaves tomorrow at around Noon local time, and we will be home in Alexandria in the evening. Our cat, Mischief, will have forgotten who we are. Our dear friend, Kristen, has very kindly been looking after poor neglected and abused Mischief while we are gone. Kristen, If you’re reading this, thanks so much once again for checking in on her now and then. Thanks for going (as you do with everything) the extra mile by reading to her and playing with her!

As for today, we woke up later and made our way back to the canal next to Christiansborgslot (Christiansborg Palace). We took a canal tour of Copenhagen, gliding underneath dozens of bridges, many of which we have biked over in the past 2 weeks. We even saw some things on the canal tour that we did not see by bike or by foot! Our guide was a cheery older Danish woman, who survived the baking sun and being exposed in the boat like the rest of us. The weather is 75 degrees here and it’s quite warm for the Danes. Back home right now it’s 100 +! We are not looking forward to returning to that!

After our canal tour, Jessi wanted another chance to have the best fish and chips she ever had in her life from a joint on the Christianshavn-side of the Inderhavnsbroen (inter-harbour bridge). Unfortunately, and unknown to us, the bridge has been shut down for renovations from 9-14 every day this week! We had to walk our way down to the Knippelsbroen (Stick Bridge) and then walk backwards to find lunch. No matter though, it helped build our appetite! We finished lunch just as the bridge opened back up, and we got two Lime bikes to take us back to the hotel for a good long rest. Once we grew bored of that, we came up here to the rooftop to enjoy some time reflecting and snacking with our cool upgraded room privileges!

Here’s our last photo dump of the trip!

Meat Valhalla (and other things)

The Winter Garden…

Inside the Glypoteket in Copenhagen is a beautiful tropical winter garden with a gorgeous glass dome.

We woke up in Malmö this morning. One of us was rather rudely awakened at 7:30 AM by their husband, but we won’t name any SPECIFIC names to protect any innocent parties. The rude awakening set into motion the usual series of morning events, which include: loud complaining about the time of day (denial), resentful statements towards a loving spouse (anger), angry thrashing in the bed (also anger), exaggerated malaise (depression), pleading for just another 10 minutes (bargaining), finally acknowledge being awake (acceptance). Then, there was a sorrowful march to breakfast.

After un-named parties had finally consumed their coffee, we made our way to Malmö Central station, where we boarded a train to København (Copenhagen), Denmark! That’s right folks! We’re back in Denmark! Josh could smell the brisket wafting from the meat-packing district across the Øresund!

We arrived at our hotel, and whaddya know, without two MASS CROWD events in the city, they were able to able to check us in early. In fact, they kindly upgraded our room! This upgrade also gives us access to a lounge that has free drinks and snacks every day from 3 pm to 9 pm! This includes beer and wine! You’ll never guess where we are writing this blog entry from!

After check in, it was time to wrap some things up. There are some things in Copenhagen that were left unseen. We need to see them before we leave. FIRST, we went shopping. We walked down the pedestrian street (Strøget) and got some souvenirs and postcards! We ate a gigantic cone of fries with chili mayo and then waddled our way over to the Ny Carlsberg Glypoteket, a sculpture museum. The museum is full of sculpture art that was collected by Carl Jacobsen (the brewer of Carlsberg beer!).

We had tremendous luck, because today the entire museum was free to the public! Everyone could wander on in to the museum and look at all the amazing sculptures. We marveled at the Rodin sculpture collection and viewed the special exhibition on Kai Nielsen (designer of the famous sculpture of a mother in the winter garden of the museum). We decided to split up to enjoy different sections of the museum. One of us had a lovely time enjoying the museum. The one of us who was rudely awakened by their spouse at 7:30 a.m. got lost in the museum and had a nice cry before finalizing realizing the art exhibit they were trying to find was closed today.

There was a pretty cool exhibit featuring ancient Egyptian scupltures and stelea. I noted that they were mostly from the late period and the Hellenistic Egyptian period (Ptolomaic - after it was conquered by Greece). There was a special exhibition by a Palestinian sculptor that was interesting, but I felt a bit like I was walking through something you might have experienced from the character “Maude” in “The Big Lebowski.” It was very interpretive and kind of strange. It did not draw me in. I spent most of my time translating what Arabic I could to distract from the jarring light show and sounds.

There was a really cool exhibit on sculptures of the early Mesopotamian and Cypriot cultures. I was particularly excited about my first encounter with a physical example of cuneiform on one of the stelae! Reading cuneiform writing is a fascination of mine, and I have plans to purchase a few starter books on Sumerian, Akkadian, and Babylonian. That’s right folks, those THREE languages and more used the cuneiform writing. Not only that, but there are historically distinctive forms of the written languages referenced. Oh, did I mention yet that sometimes Akkadian and Babylonian used Sumerian words to make up the syllables of their own words or to indicate certain vocabulary or….you know what? That’s probably enough! LOL It was cool to see cuneiform that was not annotated on a page! If you think this is cool too, check out any video featuring Irving Finkel from the British Museum on YouTube. The man is a truly amazing specimen of human being: wise, learned, and hilariously funny!

After the Glypoteket, we took an absolutely lovely bike ride over to a gorgeous Danish nature preserve called Amager Fælled! This preserve is located a bit further afield in the suburb of Amager (towards the airport) and contains meadows, fields, and forests on a HUGE parcel of land. There are trails for hiking and biking, and there are even cattle wandering over the land! It was a gorgeous way to escape the city for a little while and get a look at some amazing Danish environmental preservation. Also, what’s more “Huffowicz” than a bike ride?! #amirite?

We pedaled our way back to the center of Copenhagen during rush hour. There were bikes EVERYWHERE. Bike lanes were full and hectic. We took it easy. No need for any risky moves that might put us or someone else in danger. Folks were riding home from work or heading out to meet friends and family. The sheer volume of bikes was astounding, and it was amazing how everything flowed so well!

We came back to the hotel to write some post cards and hang out in the lounge with all the free snacks and beer! Before we knew it, it was dinner time, and we were off again to “MEAT VALHALLA” (aka War Pigs Brew Pub). We have been there 3 times since we have been in Denmark, and we freaking love it! Today they were brewing! When you walked in, you could smell the wort in the fermentation vessels at the rear of all the tables. It smelled JUST like the wort that I make in my own kitchen to brew our beers at home, so I instantly recognized the smell! The aroma of the beer and the hops and the bbq were perfect together. The place was PACKED with people! Jessi got her .25 lb of brisket with coleslaw, and I got the .5 lb with mac and cheese. Somehow a slice of key lime pie found its way onto our tray! <exaggerated gasp of surprise> It was delicious! Delicious beer was had (brewed on-site) and there may have been some rye apple whiskey drinks.

Then we came back to the hotel lounge for a relaxed evening of snacks and blog writing. Tomorrow is our last day in Denmark, and we will be flying home on Friday. We’re both excited to get home AND crushingly disappointed to be leaving. Tomorrow will be our opportunity to wrap up a few things in Copenhagen. More on that tomorrow!

Surprise Trip to Lund and Swedish Parks and Recreation!

The Turning Torso

This wacky residential building twists up into the sky, turning slightly every 6 floors. The building makes a complete 90 degree turn from bottom to top!

Today we added another city to our list of places to visit on-the-fly. That city is Lund, Sweden. We had thought about overnighting in Lund when we were planning this trip, but we decided that it might be a bit much with our agenda. Well, things have gone so smoothly with transportation and our touring objectives, that we felt like we could make a day trip from Malmö to Lund!

We woke up later and grabbed breakfast at the hotel. We walked to Malmö Central station and hopped on a train for a short 10 minute ride to our destination. Lund is known as a university town, and it is one of the oldest cities in Sweden. There is no definitive date for the city’s founding, but it is believed that the first foundations for the city were laid in the 10th century.

Lund is home to the Lund Cathedral, formerly a catholic cathedral and today a Lutheran church. The church houses a number of amazing things. The MOST amazing of these things is an astronomical clock. The clock has a top and a bottom portion, and each section gives you different information. The top section shows the position of the sun on the horizon (in reference to the position of the cathedral) and in the current zodiac as well as the time (provided in 2, repeating 12-hour counts). One hand on this clock has an orb that represents the moon on the end of an arm. The moon actually rotates on the arm independently as the arm moves, revealing the current phase of the moon. There are indicators on the clock face for different ellipticals of the sun and moon, which allow you to see the equinoxes.

The bottom of the clock has a dial that rotates one notch every 24 hours. It is significantly less impressive in my opinion, but it reveals with accuracy the correct date on the calendar. The years listed on the clock extend to the 2130s! The calendar date is indicated by a wood carving of a man pointing a stick at the dial. There are a number of letters indexed to the date, which provide the keys to reading the information on the inner dials (non-moveable). These are the various naming days and feast days for saints and such.

The clock also has an audio-visual component! At noon each day (and presumably for other hours) the clock will animate to announce the time. Two knights at the top of the clock, representing good and evil, bash their swords together as many times as the hour being announced. Then, a parade of bishops circles in front of the figure of the christian virgin Mary. They carry gifts to their god,Yahweh, and they are tailed by servants. Two trumpeters play a medieval tune as the parade occurs. It’s like an ancient cuckoo clock!

We also toured the crypt of the cathedral, where we found many ancient graves and Finn the Giant. The story of Finn the giant goes roughly as such: There was a monk in Lund, who preached to the people of Lund up on a hill. Finn and his wife and child lived under that hill, unbeknownst to the monk and the people. Finn confronted the monk and demanded to know why they were all disturbing his family with all this racket. The monk told Finn that they gather there because Lund has no church. Finn made the monk an offer. He told the monk that he will build the church if the monk can pluck the sun and moon from the sky for his child. The monk stated this was not possible, so Finn the Giant offered that the monk should pluck his eyes out upon completion of the church instead, UNLESS the monk could guess the name of the giant. The monk accepted. Finn brought stones to the site of the church and built it up, block by block. The monk guessed over the construction many many times what the giant’s name could be, but he could not come up with the correct name. Finally, one day the monk heard the giant’s wife singing to her child. The song mentioned that the child’s father was, “Finn.” So the monk ran to the cathedral just as the giant was about to lay the final stone and announced, “Finn, Finn, lay the final stone!” The giant threw the final stone down and became so angry that he descended to the crypt to tear the church down. He latched onto one of the pillars and turned into stone before he could tear it down.

Finn is still down there today in the crypt, trying to bring the church down. his wife and child are also immortalized on another column in the crypt as well. It is thought that these figures could have originally been other biblical story figures like Samson and Delilah; however, no one is certain, and I like the Finn story much better. The cathedral square contains stone-block like benches that you can move wherever you like, and each one is inscribed with that quote from the story, “Finn, Finn, lay the final stone!”

After a ton of picture taking in the pretty cathedral, we toured the university campus of Lund, which included some pretty flowers, buildings, and a hill with actual Viking rune stones! We grabbed a snack at a local coffee shop and then caught a train back to Malmö, glad for the excursion.

Back in Malmö, it was time to eat a quick lunch, and then we jumped on scooters to the world’s oldest “People’s Park,” Folkets Park. What is a People’s Park? I’m not exactly sure, but it seems to have something to do with a popular community movement being involved in its establishment. Folkets park has a number of really cool theater facilities for music and drama performances (stages), grassy fields for picnics, fountains, benches, vendors, and a tremendous playground for kids to run around and play in. It’s a sort of all-around community park that is the size of multiple city blocks. There is no price for admission! The park is open to all. Jessi and I toured the park and took a bench for a while. Then, we toured the park some more and reclined on a comfy large wooden lounger together for a while. The whole park is decked out in pink and white for all of the blooming flowers around. People were out recreating, taking their kids to the splash park, and eating ice cream and popcorn (ok, that last one was us).

From there, we scootered over to Pildammsparken near the opera house and strolled along the scenic pond, where Jessi identified a new life bird (Jessi is a birder) by sight based on her experience with he game Wingspan. We checked out the old water tower, which looks like a castle turret, and then we walked over to the opera house for a look-see. We were pretty exhausted, so we made our way back to the hotel for a quick rest.

After that we grabbed some dinner at a restaurant on the Øresund waterfront. We wanted to watch one last sunset from the water before we leave Malmö. While we were down in the neighborhood, we stopped by the turning torso building. This building is the tallest in Malmö, and it’s incredibly distinct. The turning torso is a residential building split into 6-floor blocks. These blocks are built in such a way that the building twists by 90 degrees from bottom to top! Right nearby was a curious digital art piece called “The Eye.” We took some pictures of both (below), and we scootered back to our hotel. The darkness seemed to chase us up the road as the sky slowly dimmed and the sun’s bending rays faded back into the clouds and then over the horizon..

Tomorrow, we’re going back to Copenhagen to clean up some things we left unseen! We’ll see you there!

All hail Malm-hattan, “the greatest city in the world, so they say…”

The dahlia garden

These dahlias in the King’s Garden at Malmö Castle were the highlight of the day.

Today we traveled between the cities of Helsingborg and Malmö in Sweden. We woke up and booked our train tickets over a nice breakfast at the hotel The national passenger train company in Sweden is called SJ, but the train we took was provided by a carrier called Øresundtag, a private carrier. In fact many other private carriers operate on Sweden’s rails to provide service all over the country. It was a bit confusing at first, but luckily the SJ app schedules across all the carriers and allows you to purchase tickets for your journey in one place! Nice!

Once we landed in Malmö, we were able to check into our hotel early (also NICE!). We were tired but ready to get out into town and see what Malmö is all about! It turns out, Malmö is all about tourists who came for the day from Copenhagen. Haha! The city is beautiful, with its many canals, its port, and its cool architecture.

We headed over to view Malmö Castle, which is closed for today unfortunately, but we were able to walk the ramparts, and enter the courtyard. The castle was built in the 16th century by a Danish king, Erik of Pomerania. It is the oldest castle in the Nordic area, and it was built to control shipping through the sound (Øresund) by establishing a fortress on the other side of the sound from Copenhagen. Eventually, like all castles, it fell out of use and was re-designated as a barracks and later as a prison. Eventually it fell into the hands of the Swedish state, who preserved and restored it.

We had a lovely lunch in the castle gardens and took about a billion pictures of dahlias and sunflowers. We wound our way over to the castle windmill, and we walked around the castle moat. You guys, Sweden is beautiful!

After castle-time, it was canal-tour time. Our guide to Malmö was a finicky and quirky Finn named Marcus. Marcus had all kinds of jokes for us as the boat took us around the central canal system of the city. It was Marcus who showed us all of the trees and the rocks, “telling us that these are all Malmö trees and rocks.” One quotation repeated about 1000x in every possible scenario was that “Malmö is the greatest city in the world, so they say.” What we got from the tour that was of value: Malmö grew into a port town, reclaiming a significant portion of its western holdings from the sound waters. The port of Malmö was once busy with shipping and passenger traffic, but now sits quiet today. The completion of the Øresund bridge, which spans the sound between Copenhagen and Malmö, served as a killing blow to the port. Most traffic to and from the city now flows over a bridge, rather than across the water. The architect of the West Port stands immortalized in bronze statue-form overlooking his now dormant port, which has mostly been converted to housing.

The finally indignity of the tour was referring to the city skyline as Malm-hatten. It was cheesy, but it served to get us out onto the water. Also, during the entire trip there was a Frenchman coughing his lungs up right behind me. It was clear, this guy did not have a simple cold. Folks, if you get sick on vacation, stop. Stay in your hotel. It sucks, but don’t spread your disease! Ugh!

Anyway Canal tour ended, we stopped at the hotel for a rest. After yesterday’s record setting distances, we were in need of a rest. Semi-rested we then headed out for dinner. We capped the night off with a scooter trip down to the coast of the Øresund at the extreme West side of the old port. We sat there and watched the sunset and then lingered, listening to the waves. We watched the lights in Copenhagen across the sound become brighter and brighter, as folks around us were exercising and gathering for fellowship along the shores. Eventually, we decided to call it a night. We jumped on our rented scooters and zoomed our way back to the hotel along the well-planned bike lanes of the city.

Tomorrow, we are planning to divert to a surprise bonus Swedish city, before returning to finish the day out here in Malmö. We’ll catch you all then!

The biggest freaking castle tower we’ve ever climbed

Today was SUPPOSED to be a lovely and relaxed day. Pace-wise, I think we met that goal. Physical activity-wise, we had the highest-stepping most distance walked in a single day!

We woke up and ate a buffet breakfast at this amazing hotel. Lucky we tanked up, because we didn’t realize how demanding the day would be. Now today is Sunday. In Sweden, so many things are shut down on Sunday. Here’s one thing that’s shut down: the state-owned beer and liquor stores. That’s right. In Sweden the laws are such that you must go to the nation’s alcohol monopoly store in order to buy the beer that you might want to drink on your lovely waterfront balcony later. There’s only one other problem…they close at 13:00 on Saturdays and they are closed on Sundays. A minor inconvenience though, as we sat at the rooftop bar and had some well-earned drinks as we watched the sunset over Denmark and the Øresund.

Anyway…back to our explorations. The first thing we did was go and visit a medieval castle keep, which sits at the center of the city. It offers supreme views of the city from high on a hill! It was built in the 1300s by a Danish king. Wait a minute! We’re in Sweden! Why would a Danish king build a castle in Sweden?! Welp, the short answer is that all of this area was ruled by the Danes until 1658, when all of Skäne (the region we are travelling in) was returned to Sweden in the treaty of Roskilde! The tower feels massive, and it has survived multiple proposals to blow it up from military officials. After each request the king of Sweden did not respond, and the tower lived on. In the mid-1800s the tower was crumbling. It was a complete hazard to the public, and the whole area was not the best place to hang out. A huge restoration project began, and the tower was renovated and partially restored by 1903. A grand stairwell leads you up to the castle keep past a beautiful fountain in the center of the stairwell on a platform. The keep rooms themselves are fun historical exhibits about the 13th century operation of such a castle. You ascend through each level of the castle on your way to the roof, and the view is COMPLETELY worth the climb. You can look out over the entire city from the top. Now, when we arrived at the tower this morning, the weather was rainy, dark, and cloudy. By the time we got to the top, the skies had cleared and the sun came out. It was gorgeous!

We took a bunch of pictures and descended the tower. It was time to go grab some lunch , and we knew that we wanted a picnic lunch today! The reason for that was that we planned a lovely afternoon at Fredriksdal, an 18th century manor and gardens. Basically a very wealthy person owned 36 hectares of land in Helsingborg, which eventually became open to the public. The property is covered with gardens, pastures, farm buildings, an outdoor theater, and even a windmill! We toured the rose garden, the orchard, the kitchen garden and so many more gardens! We were chased by a large black horse, who spotted us walking by and trotted over! He wanted food. We are wise enough NOT to play that game. I sincerely hope that no one but his handlers give him food. The Swedes are rule-followers, so I’m hoping that the horse was not taught that humans have snacks by rude foreign tourists. There were cows, chickens, and pigs as well. Farm buildings are scattered about the whole property, and there are period-historically preserved dwellings and utility structures that you can tour as well. On site (though closed) is a printing museum and what appeared to be a mock up of a small industrial town in the 1960s. Jessi and I enjoyed our picnic lunch of Korean Fried Chicken and dumplings. Then, we walked for miles and miles around the gardens and farms, taking all kinds of pictures as we went. The skies were a beautiful blue with puffy white clouds. The air was heavy with the smell of clean fresh air and flowers. The sun was shining so hard that I got a bit of a sunburn on my face! Given how the day began, we were NOT expecting the kind of beauty that we found today weather-wise!

After our garden/farm touring, we wound our way down to a gothic church in town. Saint Mary’s church lies just down the hill from the Kärnan. We used electric scooters to move about for most of today, so we took two scooters to the brink of the hill, parked them (in a designated place) and then walked the remainder of the way to the church.

The church is like many other gothic style churches in architecture and construction. It was originally a catholic church from the 1300s, and is thought to have been built over an existing 1100s church. After the reformation, it became a Lutheran church. When we walked in, the rich smell of candles burning was overwhelming. That’s the smell of a church, to me. The interior smelled of those candles and old wood and brick…old brick. Tombs of previous parishioners line the floors of the church with inscriptions in numerous local languages, including German. The pulpit was a very detailed series of wood carvings depicting the creation, the bible myth of Adam and Eve, and the life events of the christian Jesus myth. There was a really cool painting in the church that depicted the Kärnan castle complete with the town of Helsingborg outside its walls and all of the churches in the area plotted. Jessi noticed that there were ships hanging from the ceiling of the church. She told me that she learned that they were donated to the church by merchants and seafaring folk.

We finished up our picture-taking there and made our way past our hotel out to the parapet for a glorious view of the Øresund. The parapet is the sea wall for the Northern portion of the city, and there are a few amenities there. It also makes up the marinas, where people dock/anchor their boats. Jessi went down onto the “tropical beach” (they planted a few palm trees) so that she could dip her feet in the Øresund. I walked out to the end of the sea wall and watched two huge ferry ships pass each other on their way in and out of port! It was such fun standing out there in the salty wind. It almost knocked us both over a few times. Gulls flew overhead, and their distinctive calls made me feel like I was living in a movie.

That done, we made our way back to the hotel. We grabbed some döner kebab and pizza (takeout) to eat on our room balcony overlooking the port. After that we went up to the rooftop bar for dinks and sunset. It was an unexpectedly great day, given how the weather looked when we set out.

Tomorrow, we are off to Malmö, Sweden for two days before returning to Copenhagen, Denmark. Jessi and I have a few agenda items for Malmö, but we are looking to maybe add a surprise day-trip to another Swedish city into the mix! We’ll keep you posted!

Sweden’s Most Beautiful Park

Ferry to Sweden

Less than an hour from our hotel, we arrived in lovely Helsingborg, Sweden by way of train and ferry!

Today has been a much more restful day for your heroic travelers. We slept in until 8:30 before waking up and heading out on the day’s journey. We packed our bags and checked out of our hotel before making our way back along yesterday’s day-trip route to Helsingør. We definitely recommend the Zleep hotel in Hillerød! We enjoyed our stay here very much! From the train station, we easily found the double doors to the ferry services (ForSea) to take us to Helsingborg, Sweden. The tickets were dispensed from a self-service machine on the second floor and the signboard told us we had about 10 minutes to catch the ferry. We scanned our tickets and were let aboard with no further passport / ticket checks. 20 minutes later, here we were wandering the streets of a new country!

We had decided to pay for an early check-in to our hotel, so we enjoyed a lingering visit to the local Espresso House (yes, we’re obsessed. They are awesome!), while we waited for the clock to chime noon. From the ferry terminal, we had a beautiful view of the sound and the Helsingborg City Hall. Finally, it was time to check-in! Folks, this is the splurge hotel of the trip. Our room has a sea view, overlooking the Øresund (the sound that separates Denmark from Sweden). From our room, we have not one but two balconies. The primary balcony is furnished with a table and chairs for sitting outside and enjoying the view. In clear skies, we can see Kronborg (Halmet castle!) easily across the sound.

After checking into our hotel, the plan for the day was simple - go to Sofiero Palace, a place billed in tourist booklets as “The Most Beautiful Park in Europe.” Folks, it did not disappoint! We rented “Ryde” scooters and rode 2.5 miles of the journey along beautiful beaches with sweeping views of the Øresund and the castle off to our left. When the scooters let us know we had left the “allowed geo-fenced area” we parked them and walked the remaining mile on foot on a beautiful shared bike/pedestrian path. Sofiero itself (the palace) is quite modest in comparison to the grandeur we’ve seen in Denmark. However, you don’t go to the palace to visit the building. You go to visit the grounds! They are immaculate and words will not explain just how beautiful the place is.

Sofiero Palace is a 19th century construction built as a Royal residence. It was gifted to the town of Helsingborg by King Gustaf VI upon his death and is now managed as a public park for the benefit of the Swedish people. This palace was his favorite place in the world, and he wanted his fellow citizens to be able to experience it. His wife, Louise was a Mountbatten with ties to the British throne. Her British heritage influenced the gardens as they grew and developed. Gustaf also installed a rhododendron garden and a beautiful scenic path through it on the property. The dahlia garden was in full bloom, and everywhere around us it seemed that ripened apples and pears were falling from the orchard that weaves its way through the gardens. In fact, one almost hit Jessi in the head, while we took a break on one of the garden benches! Truly a “Isaac Newton moment!” The pears and apples had a sweet and acidic smell that rose softly above the magnificent smell of all the flowers in bloom.

There is a tiny fee to enter - around $30 USD for two adults. Families are encouraged to bring picnic lunches and eat anywhere on the lawns, benches or tables set up for their enjoyment. If you prefer, however, there is a restaurant overlooking Øresund and there are small vendors that sell ice cream or other small treats throughout. We, fortunately, were prepared for a picnic lunch. We had purchased pre-made sandwiches and a bag of chips along our journey. We spread out on a bench and took in the glorious views of the palace building itself before exploring the grounds by foot. We walked through a hedge maze and thoroughly enjoyed the special exhibit of around 15 different varieties of Dahlias. When our feet started to hurt from the wandering, we decided to wander back to our hotel.

We retraced our steps to the scooters and then rode back to the hotel. This blog is being written from the 8th floor rooftop bar where we are enjoying a beer while watching the sun set over the sound. What a beautiful day! Tomorrow we will explore what the rest of Helsingborg has to offer, including touring the historic tower.

The Bard Said it Best - - Something is Rotten in the State of Denmark

The sleeping giant

Deep underneath Kronborgslot, Holger the Dane slumbers deeply, only to be awoken if Denmark comes under threat.

Today we made a day trip to Krongborg Castle in Helsingør, Denmark. It’s located on the northeastern side of the island of Zealand, directly across a body of water called the Øresund from Sweden. Immediately when leaving the train station at the port of Helsingør, you can see across the fairly short span of water into the city of Helsingborg, Sweden. Shipping, fishing, and ferry traffic dominate your view as you tear your eyes off the shimmering waterfront to behold the stark image of a giant wind and rain-swept castle and fortress on the coast. This is Kronborgslot, and it was William Shakespeare’s inspiration for the castle of Elsinore in the play Hamlet.

We fought our way over to the castle entrance through the intense wind and spitting rain. I can certainly see why Shakespeare took inspiration from the castle and its surroundings. We can certainly understand what he might have taken for Hamlet from the weather we were treated to. Cold, windy, and rainy were the orders of the day. Josh was in heaven. Jessi was a meat popsicle in an orange rain jacket. Poor Jessi had to keep taking her hearing aides out of her ears to mitigate agains the howling winds.

We toured the castle with fervor, climbing 145 spiral castle stairs to the canon perches on the roof for a beautiful view of the whole castle, battlements, and barracks. Jessi attempted to become a human kite in the blustery wind, but alas the strong winds failed to lift her. (Jessi here: it was a tiny bit disappointing to have so much wind and a giant wind breaker and not be able to convert myself into a kite! I’ll just have to try again when we come back!)

Kronborgslot was originally a smaller castle, known as the Krogen (the Hook). The castle is located strategically along the Øresund (strait) to control shipping traffic in the water between Sweden and Denmark. The museum had a small pile of “rose coins,” on display. Bringing goods from Sweden to to port of Helsingør required one such coin in tribute to the possessor of the castle (the Danish King). Frederik II erected a grand castle over the original Krogen in the mid-1500s, and the resulting royal residence became known as Kronborgslot. There is a story that Frederik II had originally intended to name the castle after his beloved wife Sophie (Sophieslot). As seems to happen to all things that are flammable in antiquity, the castle burned down less than a century later, and King Christian IV began the project to restore Kronborgslot to his own standards in the mid 1600s. In the 1700s, the castle was converted from a royal residence to a military barracks, where soldiers were stationed until 1923. The castle was renovated and returned to the public for visitation. There was a small divergence in the 1940s, when Denmark was occupied by Nazi Germany.

Easily the coolest thing in the castle were the casements and battlements, which you can wander. These underground passages take you deep beneath the castle and battlement walls! The Danes have chosen to keep the installation of modern lighting underneath the castle to a minimum, so these passages are lit with small oil lamps. The faint flicker of the oil lamps and their distinctive smell in the deep, dark, musty passages give you the feeling of going back in time, when invading Swedes forced the castle defenders to take haven in the casements for months. It must have gotten pretty rank down there! These passages originally housed horses and supplies for the castle, and served to protect the inhabitants in the event of an attack or siege.

Jessi here… the casements were easily one of the coolest things I’ve ever gotten to experience! I’ve spent a lifetime in the “public attractions” business, starting from the carnival my family owned and operated when I was a kiddo to public land management today. I could never have imagined this kid from Las Vegas, NV walking through the casements of a hundreds of years old castle in Denmark. There are almost no lights to guide your way, and the floor is not kept level. There are no plank floors or class casings to keep visitors safe. Instead, you are walking carefully through a dark, dank casement following the random directional arrow to find your way out. At times, I had to use my cell phone flashlight to see the floor before me. It was such a unique, one-of-a-kind experience that I will never forget! It was amazing to be able to touch the real walls and feel the real stone beneath my (sneaker-clad) feet.

In the dark gloom of these passages sits a giant. He is leaned forward and slumbering over his mighty sword. His name is Holger the Dane, and he passes the ages deep beneath Kronborgslot awaiting the call to action, when Denmark is threatened by outsiders. He will harken to the call and aid in the defense of Denmark and the defeat of the enemy. Until that time, he sits in the flickering oil lamp-light. His quiet snores fill the chambers, echoing in the darkness. On the wall in the chamber near to Holger is a list of similar stories from other cultures worldwide about similar protector stories. This was such a neat connection to the world!

From the casements, we proceeded to the royal chambers. Like much of the castle, the rooms have been renovated several times since the founding of the castle; however, we were treated to a recreation of the royal chamber of Frederick II and his wife Sophie. We learned that their chambers were carefully selected based on how easy it would be to heat them, and the selected rooms stayed warmer than much of the rest of the castle! To put the tour in perspective, this section was dotted with living history actors playing various roles from “Hamlet” who you could interact with. They seemed to speak many languages including Danish, English and German - so talented! We decided to leave them be and let the families with kiddos enjoy that part of the tour.

There is also a chapel that was miraculously untouched by the fire in the mid 17th century, but the pews and furniture were removed in order to use the space as a fitness hall for soldiers. After the soldiers moved out and the castle was returned to the public, all of the original furniture and the pews were returned to the chapel. It was reconstructed to look as it would have during the time of Frederik II. The organ of the chapel underwent restoration (the pipes), but the facade of the organ is original. Amazing! The chapel smells old. It smells like that ancient wood smell. It’s hard to describe, but you know it when you smell it.

The grounds of Kronborgslot are quite large, and we were pretty exhausted, so we ambled our way back to Helsingør train station, and we boarded a local train back to Hillerød. Tomorrow we plan to cross the Øresund by ferry to arrive in our next destination: Helsingborg, Sweden! We will see you there!

Hillerød’s Not so Hidden Gems

Order of the Elephant: Dwight D Eisenhower

Eisenhower was awarded with the highest order of merit in Denmark, and his coat of arms hangs in the chapel where kings and queens were crowned.

So today started out in NOT the most efficient manner. We trudged out of our hotel in Roskilde and boarded a regional train BACK to Copenhagen, so that we could transfer to an S train (urban-suburban train) to make our way North to Hillerød. It turns out that we REALLY could have just kept our Hotel in Copenhagen and made a day trip to Roskilde instead of overnighting. Nonetheless, we think it’s good that we had an opportunity to spend the night somewhere different, and we didn’t have to hurry to get back on a train back to Copenhagen!

There was a VERY loud group of Americans on the train. An older father was traveling with his wife and three adult daughters in Denmark. He had previously lived in Denmark as a mormon missionary (commence rolling of the eyes), which is kind of ridiculous given Denmark’s religious sensibilities. I do love the Danish take on religion…KEEP IT TO YOURSELF! No, we didn’t talk to any of them. How did we know all this? Because they blabbed AT each other at high volume the entire time we were on the train: “How many stops do we have left?” “We’re going to Hiller-rod street right? Oh that ‘St’ means station?” “Do you know who died recently?” One of them was actually reading her emails out loud to her mother. This was followed by the out-loud reading of obituaries. What in the damned hell?! Jessi and I were baffled. The Danes in the car gawked and stared and blinked. Their withering looks and death glares radiated off of the noisy, rude oblivious Americans, and we just covered our faces, and smiled, and shook our heads.

When the train finally pulled into Hillerød STATION, we walked the short distance into town and dropped off our bags at the hotel. It was time to visit a fairy tale castle from the 17th century…

Frederiksborgslot

This amazing castle was built for King Christian IV in the 1600s. He must have really liked this place, because his name and monogram and picture are everywhere on the grounds and in the palace.

The castle of Christian IV was actually built on top of another castle, built by Frederik II (hence the name Frederiksborgslot), and at the time it was the largest royal residence in Europe. Unfortunately, the whole thing burned in a fire in 1849, and so much of the original interior was lost forever. Some parts of the castle survived; however, a good amount of the castle was left with just its walls. The castle was built back up and restored with the help of J.C. Jacobsen, a brewer in Copenhagen. You might have heard of his world famous beer, Carlsberg!

One cool thing I need to point out right away: Ole Christian IV had a throne elevator that popped out up into his audience chamber. The museum guide confirms that the museum has tested this mechanism, and it does, indeed, work! Now I kind of want my own! Wouldn’t it be awesome if you came to our house and I appeared from the floor on my own throne? We call that a conversation starter!

In the planning of the restoration, the royal family declined to keep the castle as a residence, and so it was decided that the castle would be restored as the National Museum of the History of Denmark. The halls were filled with paintings and artifacts of Denmark’s past. New paintings were commissioned to depict crucial moments in Denmark’s history. The castle chapel, where kings and queens were crowned, was restored to its former majesty. Today, we had the pleasure and privilege to tour all of it. The experience is information overload. The castle is split into sections for each reigning regent of Denmark who lived there. Each section is styled after the particular period for when that king/queen was on the throne and displays paintings and artifacts from other key historical figures of the time. For example Christian VII’s room was styled in 18th century rococo, and it contained many pictures of the 17 year old schizophrenic boy that became a king. It also contained paintings of his wife, and the travelling doctor, who basically ruled over the kingdom when Christian VII was very ill. His name was Johan Friedrich Struensee, and he jockeyed with all the other court doctors to elbow his way into the king’s affections at court. He was rumored to be in love with the queen as well. On our tour of the National Museet (National Museum) in Copenhagen, we saw the axe that was used to execute him!

One really cool thing about the castle was the chapel, which contains the majority of the shields with coats of arms that are scattered all over the castle. These shields are made when one Denmark’s two national orders of merit are issued for someone. They bear the name of that person, the date that the order was bestowed, and that person’s coat of arms. It seems that there are thousands of these hanging in the chapel and on the stairwells of the castle. The two orders are: The order of the Dannebrog and the Oder of the Elephant.

The Order of the Dannebrog is awarded to Danes (both men and women) for major contributions to Danish society either civil or military. It is also awarded to diplomats and foreign dignitaries under certain conditions. The sashes on those plates are white and have the Dannebrog (Danish Cross) at the bottom in white.

The Order of the Elephant is an ancient chivalric order of another name from the 15th century that morphed into what we know today. It is the highest order of merit that can be given by Denmark, and its membership consists of mostly members of the royal family and foreign heads of state. On very rare occasion, the order has been bestowed on a commoner. The sashes of these sheilds are blue, and an elephant pendant with a castle on its back hangs beneath the sash. Something super surprising to discover was that US President Dwight Eisenhower is one such head of state that was awarded this merit in the post-war era. Thusly, President Eisenhower has a shield of his own, bearing his name and personal coat of arms. I spent about 15 minutes hunting it down. It was super hard to find at first (there are a lot of shields), but was actually hung at about eye-level! I had to look up Eisenhower’s coat of arms and scan the walls in order to find it. I have included a picture below!

Another hidden gem was an art installation on the third floor, containing art from Denmark’s modern era 1910-today. There were some really cool paintings, showing artists and poets in portrait as well as current and previous royals. There were also busts, and a special exhibit of normal Danes doing normal Danish things. A portrait of Danish astronaut Andreas Mogensen adorns the walls as well. There were busts of the famous philosopher Kierkegaard, and a portrait of Hans Christian-Anderson. It was super neat!

One of the key features of this castle is a stunning baroque-style garden on its North side. The garden is kept in pristine condition and is available for all citizens to stroll and enjoy. While we were there, many Danes were out enjoying a bike ride around the park or walking their dogs or running the beautiful paths around the gardens and woods. I’ll tell you…it was good to be the king! The stunning beauty of these gardens dropped our jaws. They seem to go on and on forever. Where the well kept gardens end, begin beautiful national forests, which once belonged to the royal family too. Glades of trees give way to ponds and lakes and streams with islets and small castles, bath palaces, and outposts. The whole thing is like some fairy tale come true. You would think that the rainy weather might have put a hamper on our will to explore the area, but it actually somehow made everything EVEN MORE beautiful. The rain spurred us on to keep walking! At some point we had to quit. We were exhausted. Earlier, between touring the castle and touring the gardens, we had checked into our hotel formally and taken a breather in our room. I don’t think we would have made it out of the woods otherwise!

Sore and weary, we stumbled our way back to the hotel for a rest, and then we ambled out to find dinner. Dinner came in the form of tapas from a restaurant near the edge of Hillerød’s main drag. We saw it and marked it on our way in this morning. I wasn’t expecting it, but these tapas are the best meal I’ve had in Denmark so far. I think it was the restaurant owner was serving us, and seemed to appreciate me telling him so. We didn’t really order a dessert, but suddenly it appeared and hey…what the hell right? Why not! We were not disappointed with a lemon curd, brownie, and a velvety creamy panna cotta.

There’s no way that I’ve covered any amount of material that is acceptable in relation to the wealth of knowledge contained in that castle, but I hope that I have at least brought a few neat things to the fore for you.

Thanks for tagging along and enjoy some lavish castle pictures!

Connecting with Harald Bluetooth in Roskilde!

Viking Ship Under Construction!

Too bad we’re missing the launch of this ship on Aug 30, 2024! A new Viking Ship from the Faroe Islands.

Today we woke up early, so that we could get on the road to our next destination, Roskilde. Roskilde has a rich history of Viking culture and was actually the capital of Denmark between 1100 CE and 1443 CE. It was supposedly founded with the building of a wooden church by King Harald Bluetooth in 1022. That church was eventually built over with a cathedral, and that cathedral was finally completed in about 1200 CE. No remains of the old wooden church have ever been found, but the city that Harold started flourished and grew. Today it is one of the top 10 Danish cities in population! It is situated at the south side of the Roskilde Fjord, from which Viking ships did much trading and raiding.

“Bluetooth?!” I hear you say, “Isn’t that how I listen to my music wirelessly?” Yes, We all know that the ghostly spirit of Harald Bluetooth is used to connect those headphones to all of your music player devices! Just kidding! BUUUUUUT the connection protocol was definitely named after him, since the Bluetooth standard unites all protocols. Similarly, Harald Bluetooth united the Danish people for the first time. Naming the Bluetooth standard after Harald was a love letter to the Viking culture and history by the man at Intel, who developed the technology. By the way, Bluetooth’s actual nordic rune marking (used to identify him) is used to designate the protocol visually. I guarantee that you’ve seen it before and not known. It’s made up of two runes bound together, H + B:

Two Younger Futhark Runes combined, form Harald Bluetooth’s rune

The Viking Ship Museum

In the 1950s a few divers discovered some wood from a ship in the Roskilde Fjord. They brought it to the Danish government as a possible heritage item from the 1700s and found that the wood dated back to the 1000s! In the coming decades the area around the ships was drained and excavated very carefully to extract the remnants of 5 Viking ships, which were scuttled on top of one another. They found Rocks in the hulls of the ships to weigh them down. How do we know that the Vikings threw rocks into the ships (and that the ships didn’t just decay around the rocks)? They ALSO found boxes of rocks IN the ships. Why? Why were these ships just scuttled in the fjord? Well the fjord is shallow across the narrowest portion, except for a small stretch where it’s deep enough to sail through. Those ships were likely scuttled to plug up that deeper stretch of the fjord and prevent other ships from attacking Roskilde and the other towns/villages around the fjord!

Those scuttled ships were eventually recovered and preserved for all to see. The different ships have different purposes according to their constructions. We took a guided tour of the museum, and I cannot recommend that enough. The guide took us through each type of ship that was recovered and gave us an idea of what they were used for and how they were constructed. There was a longer and thinner war ship, built for speed and agility. There were trading and fishing vessels, built wider for stability. We learned that Viking ships used lapped or overlaid planks. The hulls of the ship are NOT flat. The ships began by constructing the neck/keel/spine of the boat by craftsman who were very well compensated. These craftsmen had to be good at what they did, because the rest of the boat is built around those parts! If you mess up, the ENTIRE boat will be messed up!

Outside the museum is a living history demonstration and Viking ship construction yard! It’s really neat! You can go out on a Viking ship and ride into the fjord, rowing as a team. Currently they are building a ship from the Faroe Islands that will be launched on the day that we are leaving Denmark…BUMMER. We were able to take some cool pictures of the workshop that the ship is being built in. They also use authentic tools, rope, and forged nails to build their ships. You can stand there and watch blacksmiths making parts for the ship, and you can see the ropemaker making rope for the sails and rigging. I was the knot kid in my Boy Scout troop (there’s always one and everyone hates that kid lol), so I tied all the nots on the example board and left them for folks to see how they work. All of them were knots I had learned in Boy Scouts. We grabbed some ice cream to accompany us on our walk up a glorious pathway to the Roskilde Cathedral.

Roskilde Cathedral

The Roskilde Domkirke was originally a catholic church, but was made into a Lutheran church after the Reformation. It was the ONLY cathedral in Denmark until the 20th century! Today the church is the official burial place for all of the Danish regents, and because some of them were also king or queen of Norway (Denmark ruled them for a while), the cathedral has one or two of Norway’s regents as well. There are over 1000 people estimated to be buried in the church, but we don’t know who all of them are. The floor of the church is strewn with the human-sized gravestones and epitaphs of Danish citizens. There are burial vaults for all kinds of people built into the the chancellery from all sides. One such chamber hosts the coffins of the children of the royal family. The kings and queens of Denmark get their own lavish chapels built onto the cathedral with opulent raised caskets. Their tombs are coated with lovely velvet, and the finest wood. They are hewn from the finest stone, and they are gilt in gold, and copper and silver. They are adorned with the symbols of state and with the symbols customary to their times. They seem to be never ending. There are so very many of them, and each of them is a testament to the grandness of the sovereign and the master craftsmen, who made these caskets. In particular the monuments to Christian III and Frederik II were amazing. They sepulchral monuments which stand at least 15 ft high (if not 20). They are essentially copies of each other with some minor differences to detail. Frederik II’s name panel is incomplete because the architect died before the monument was completed. There are 4 men dressed in classical Roman attire standing around the monuments. Each king is depicted as alive on the top of the monument, reading a book and praying. Down below, they lay in repose, dead and gone…well gone as you can be with these gigantic monuments marking where your body lies. They are both entombed underneath the monument as are their wives.

There were some interesting descriptions of some of the kings in the endless rooms of coffins and caskets and tombs. A few of the placards described a king or two as not wanting to be king, and they drove the country near to bankruptcy or were known for throwing lavish parties. Others described unfortunate circumstances such as a king that was schizophrenic, and was constantly bullied. He then died very young. Yet, the great majority of the kings and queens in the cathedral were memorialized, rightly, as heroes of their country, who embodied the values of their people.

After the cathedral, we had a bit of a rest and went out for a sumptuous dinner at a restaurant called Rib house. BUT - in typical Danish fashion, a reservation was required. So, we quickly made a reservation for about 45 minutes later and went for a short walk. On our walk, we found an old cemetery right across from the train station - Gråbrødre Kirkegård (Greyfriars Cemetery). While there, we found the grave of Christoph(er) Ernst Friedrich Weyse, a famous Danish composer who composed a number of songs still in use in Lutheran churches in Denmark today. The tree near his grave has carved musical notes in it! During our short visit to the cemetery, we were treated to a “sun shower” and the most beautiful, vibrant rainbow we’ve ever seen. It was stunning!

Finally, we wandered back to the restaurant where we had rather a good meal, and we’re both exhausted. Tomorrow we make our way to Hillerød by way of…Copenhagen. That’s right., we have to take a train BACK to Copenhagen in order to take another train to Hillerød. That was my mistake when scheduling this trip, I applied United States visual distance standards to the area of Zealand, Denmark. I had thought for sure that the distances between these places justified an overnight stay. Although, while Roskilde might have been easier to accomplish as a day-trip for the logistics, we are both glad that we took the time to overnight here and experience the city a little more than we might have if we rushing to catch a train back to Copenhagen at the end of the day.

We’ll see you all there!

Palace-palooza 2024

The Little Mermaid (Den Lille Havfrue) Copenhagen

From the story that you might only THINK you know…

The Little Mermaid

Like yesterday, the weather today was absolutely perfect. We don’t know how we managed it, but we got two back-to-back days in Copenhagen with clear, sunny skies and temperatures above 70* F. Also like yesterday, everyone was out and about enjoying the day. I’m beginning to think that the Danes are lying about their famous cloudy/rainy weather just to keep the place from being over-touristed! It is fun to see the city transforming back to what we imagine must be “normal” life after the Pride and Ironman events blocked off major parts of it. We were able to get clear pictures of the City Hall and visit Christiansborg Palace (more below) for the first time since arriving.

We woke up late (again! We know! We’re slackers for not leaving the hotel before 9 a.m. two days in a row!). We hadn’t yet explored Copenhagen by bike and since that’s such an huge part of who we are and why we travel, we decided today was the day! We each bought a multi-hour bike pass for Lime e-bikes, which allowed us to travel around all day for one set fee. For our first adventure, we decided that we would be biking down to see the little mermaid statue on Copenhagen’s waterfront. We were supposed to check this out on day 1, but we were way too tired! It’s kind of one of those “you’re here and you gotta do it” things. It’s easily the MOST touristy thing in town, and people by the bus load (actual busses) go down the the large pedestrian waterfront street (Langelinie) and see this tiny statue of a little mermaid on a rock. It’s nearly impossible to get a decent picture, people are trying to crawl out to the damned statue…it’s basically a nightmare. But if you’re in Copenhagen, you are basically obligated to do it. The statue depicts Hans Christian-Anderson’s famous fairy tale character of the little mermaid. The statue has had a pretty crazy history. Its head has been cut off twice by vandals. One beheading was as recent as 1998. Her left arm was also taken by vandals and then later returned. She is a statue that welcomes you into the harbor, and she is world famous. She was removed in 2010 to be a part of Denmark’s Expo 2010 in Shanghai China. During that time, a live image of the statue in China was projected onto a screen in her original location.

Ok…now…

I would like to tell you a little story. Wherever you are, get comfortable. Pull up a warm blanket. Turn the lights down. Have a nice glass of something warm and cozy.

Ready?

Ok now imagine me sitting there with you and brushing my scraggly head of hair and smiling Disney-style, because it’s about to get a little creepy. You may think that you know the tale of the little mermaid from your happy little Disney movies, but I am sorry to tell you that the world is dark and scary…and everything you know about the little mermaid is wrong…AND THE TRUTH IS TERRIFYING!

So yeah, basically there’s a little mermaid girl. She is the youngest of a number of sisters. When they turn 15, mermaids get to go check out what’s happening above the water. But they are still mermaids…so they have to stay IN the water. They can swim up streams and rivers, etc. All the other sisters are enamored at first, but then they realize that they have it much better “under the sea.” So the little mermaid (unnamed in the story by the way) goes up and saves a prince, whose ship sinks after his birthday party. She hauls his dumbass to the beach and leaves him there. She watches secretly as a woman comes and calls for help, but the prince was not conscious when she saved him. He doesn’t know what really happened. The little mermaid falls into an unrequited love with the prince and then into a deep depression. The pride of her life was her underwater garden, and that garden falls to ruin in her depression. Events transpired that take her to a sea witch, who makes her a potion to drink so that she can go up on land and be with the prince. Like with all fairy-tale witches, conditions apply. She will, yes, lose her voice. That’s one for you, Walt. BUT ALSO she will gain the ability to dance like no other human can dance. So, performance modifier +10! BUT every step she takes will feel like she is walking on sharp knives, and the pain of losing her tail will NEVER leave her. Sounds fun right? It gets better! She is a mermaid, and mermaids do not have souls like humans do. Mermaids may live 300 years, but they dissolve into sea foam when they die and are nothing. The little mermaid wants a soul. So the witch says she must marry the prince to do this. This way, some of the prince’s soul will transfer into her. If she fails, then on the next day after the wedding, she will DIE and dissolve into foamy nothing. The kids love that part! So anyway she swims up, takes the potion, feels like she was run through with a sword, passes out, and wakes up in the prince’s arms. YAY!!! And they lived happily ever…just kidding! Because she is mute, the prince keeps her around as his confessor pet. He tells her his secrets and desires. He does not fall in love with her. Eventually he is betrothed in an arranged marriage to a princess in a foreign land…the one who “saved” him on the beach no less! They get married! And they lived…hang on a second. What happens to the little mermaid? Her heart is broken and she knows that she is going to die. She is visited by her sisters, who sold their beautiful hair to the sea witch in exchange for a dagger. They bring the dagger to the little mermaid, so that she can use it to kill the prince and spill his blood on her feet. Only in this way can she return to being a mermaid. Still having fun? How’s that warm drink? Ok so anyway, she sneaks up on him at night, while he is in bed with his new wife after the wedding, but she cannot do it. So she throws herself and the dagger off a ship and dissolves into foam at dawn. There’s a bit about her being resurrected in some spiritual way that allows her to live and do good deeds as a spirit for 300 years before she RECEIVES a soul and can go to heaven but…the End. Wasn’t that nice?

Gefionspringvandet (Gefion Fountain)

Nearby along the Langelinie is the Gefion Fountain. Gefion (Gefjon) is the goddess of ploughing. The Swedish King offered her land. The condition was that he would give her as much as she could plow in one day. So, she turned her 4 sons into super-oxen (boss move) and ploughed a TON of land off of Sweden and threw it into the sea, forming Zealand (the island that makes up Eastern Denmark). If you look at a map of Denmark and Sweden, it ACTUALLY looks like this took place. It really looks like land that was formerly locked into Sweden was cut away from it. The puzzle pieces REALLY seem to fit! While we were visiting, there were multiple tour busses arriving and departing to show off this magnificent fountain. It sort of reminded both us of the Trevi fountain of Rome with the tourist interest.

The Kastellet (Citadel)

In the same area, near the harbor, is an operating military citadel. They allow folks to come through their parade/assembly areas and walk the ramparts. They ask that you please not be a jerk and keep off the grass. We happily obliged. Armed guards are stationed at the gates of the citadel as you enter, keeping watch over entrance to the place by car mostly.

We walked the beautiful grassy ramparts and enjoyed the wonderful wildlife and flowers in the moat. Did I say this thing has a moat? Yeah, it’s a citadel. It has a moat! Jessi got to do a little bird watching and added two new life birds! She’s LOVING getting to see some “new to her” species of birds that don’t make regular appearances in North America. We also found a lovely coffee shop for a mid-morning latte, and while it was delicious, it wasn’t quite the same as our new favorite “Espresso House” chain.

Royal Opera House

We jumped on the bikes and headed along the harbor to cross into Christianshavn over a pedestrian and bike only bridge. We loved it. Biking here is easy and the best way to get around. Actually better than the metro! So we biked over to the absolutely gorgeous Royal Opera House on the other side of the harbor. We parked and walked the grounds a bit before heading inside. The architecture of the building is fascinating. All the smooth curves in the building give you the sense that everything flows. A very nice Danish woman approached me and Jessi to point out the chandeliers on the second floor. They were made by a famous Icelandic artist Olafur Eliasson. They are glass globes, composed from multiple glass pieces of different colors. We’ve ACTUALLY seen his work before in Tivoli Gardens. There is a small aerial art project of his in the same sort of style, but not with globes.

Christiania (AKA Hippy-town)

After we got a good look at the Opera House, we again found our bikes and took a short ride to the free city of Christiania. We wanted to see it since it is so hyped up in our tourist book and in the online materials we reviewed. It was…. Fine? It was very touristy and not really the “independent” landscape we were expecting. There were merchants selling wares, but they all seemed to be mass-produced “Chinesium” that you could get at any outdoor market in the world. Glad that we took the time to stop, but also don’t feel any need to visit again.

After that, we stopped off in Christianshavn near the Inderhavnsbroen (pedestrian/bikes only bridge). I gobbled down a Danish sausage with an amazing potato salad, and Jessi had the best, freshest fish and chips of her life. She has not stopped talking about it yet. It’s starting to get annoying!

Once lunch was over, we jumped back across the bridge and took some pretty pictures of the houses in Nyhavn, a 17th century waterfront section of Copenhagen. The colorful houses and canal setting are a neat feature that is worth a few minutes for a pic or two. Then, we walked over to the nearby Kongens Nytorv (King’s New Square), where there is a beautiful garden set into a square in the middle of Copenhagen. We got a quick peep at YET ANOTHER Palace…well… this one is a former palace actually. Charlottenborgslot is now an exhibition hall. Unfortunately we didn’t have any time to go in today. We had bigger fish to fry…great…now Jessi’s lunch is coming back to haunt me again…

Christiansborg Palace

Christiansborg Palace is the seat of all branches of the Danish government housed in one complex. We had planned tour this palace yesterday, but we had run out of time. To be honest, we were not actually sure what this palace had to offer. Oh man did we underestimate what was there. It was absolutely awesome. Our ticket afforded us tours of 4 parts of the palace: Royal Reception Rooms, Palace Ruins, Royal Kitchen, and the Royal Stable. Unfortunately all of the other parts were so AWESOME that we didn’t get to the stable in time. It was super unfortunate, because the stable is the oldest part of the palace. Why is the stable the oldest part? Easy, it’s the only part of the palace that didn’t burn down! The palace has burnt down at least two times in its history, and new palaces were built on top of it. Previous to all of those fires, the palace was sacked and disassembled brick-by-brick!

We know all of this because we took a tour of the palace ruins. Deep in a basement of the palace, the ruins of the previous palaces and fortresses have been found. These ruins dat back to the 12th century and the founding of Copenhagen by Bishop Absalon! It was incredible to look upon the stone walls of the original fortress that built the city we see today! You could see how the footprint of each successor palace got bigger and bigger. They built directly on top of the previous buildings, sometimes using passages from the older ones for things like drain pipe runs. We heard a really neat story about the daughter of a King who was kept in the palace prison for 21 years and released. This was over a succession quarrel. She wrote a 16th century memoir about it when she was finally let free, and we will be looking for the English translation of that. That will be quite a read!

The Royal Reception rooms were also a treat. We had the opportunity to walk through the same rooms where foreign dignitaries and heads of state come to dine and meet the Danish royal family. We stood in a library directly beneath the office of the Prime minister of Denmark. We came in off the street. We paid for a tour, and then we were standing in the room where the Prime Minister met with Fmr. Pres. Barack Obama and Fmr. UK PM Theresa May. We gawked at the stunning opulence and the history of the room. We kept asking each other, “why would they let just anyone in here?” We were walking through serious reception halls and dining rooms and antechambers where statesmen and diplomats go about the business of world politics and democracy. We had this overwhelming feeling of, “We don’t belong here, stepping on the rug that was given to the Queen as a gift from her parliament.” It felt too real! You could never do this in the USA without pre-registration, being searched in NCIC, and going through a magnetometer! And then, you would need to be escorted by someone who would watch you like a hawk! Here, we were left to our own recognizance in the hallowed halls where the Danes display sacred artifacts from their history. We even walked into the throne room! I’m still blown away. I have no words to say except that unfortunately, we don’t have a culture in the USA where this would be possible. Many people are thoughtless, and I think a minority of them (just enough) would wreck everything. This is an evolved society here in Denmark.

We were ridiculously tired after our Charlottenborgslot tour, so we stopped of at the hotel for a quick rest. We decided to go to War Pigs BBQ again tonight! Guys, it’s seriously THAT good. I really would not be surprised if we do it again on our way back through!

I think I could write about Charlottenborgslot for another 2 hours at least, but we have an early morning tomorrow. We are planning to eat out of town early and head for our next city destination, Roskilde! We’ll see you all there!

Crowns, Castles, Palaces, and WARPIGS?!

These three lions…

are not lyin’. If you try to approach the throne with the wrong intentions, you’re going to regret it!

Today you’re getting a Josh & Jessi combo post. What a treat! What a rarity! Our day was made amazing by an unsually sunny, bright, warm day in Copenhagen! The high temperature today was around 70* F and there were hardly any clouds and not a drop of rain! Everyone (citizens and tourists alike) were out to enjoy the beautiful weather. We are so lucky to get to experience such a gorgeous day in this lovely city. Come to think of it, with exception to our first day, every day has been amazing weather. Denmark is well known as a rainy and cold place.

That said, we started slowly because we decided to sleep late this morning! With an 8 a.m. wake up call (instead of our usual 6 a.m.), we didn’t leave the hotel/nearby coffee shop until just after 10 a.m. Speaking of coffee….. have we mentioned the proliferation of the “Espresso Cafe” here Copenhagen yet? They are absolutely everywhere and they are amazing. It’s like the Danish (Nordic?) cousin of Starbucks, but better. Josh’s favorite is an extra-shot latte and Jessi’s is an extra-shot vanilla oat milk latte. Delicious and a great way to start any day…. Or have an afternoon snack… or a nightcap. Really, just good any time of the day.

Anyway, back to our day! Today was castle-palooza! We toured two castles today - Amalienborg and Rosenborg. Both of which at some point doubled as royal residences making them also palaces! (Josh is going to correct this, I’m sure. His love of pedantry is part of what I find so lovable about him.) Moving on….

Hi…Josh here…um actually castles are built for protection, and palaces are built for comfort in residence. Rosenborgslot is a castle with a moat around it and some protective features. It kind of straddles the line between the two without any noted additional defensive features. I argue that the moat technically qualifies it as a castle. Amalienborg is 4 individual palace buildings in a palace complex. It rests on Amalienborgpladse in 4 distinct buildings, having similar architecture. They were built to house the Danish Royal Family comfortably here in the heart of Copenhagen. These buildings were not necessarily built for protection AND the ceremonial protection of the building is provided by a palace guard battalion.

At Amalienborgslot, we got to see a special exhibition (limited time, ending September 8, 2024) honoring the newly crowned Danish King Frederik X. It was a really great exhibit, showcasing the push/pull of modern life on a child born into a royal family. I (Jessi) really loved the section of the exhibit examining the role of the press (Danish and international) in Frederick’s life and journey to adulthood. I recently finished “Spare” by Prince Harry and found some troubling similarities in the two stories.

Josh: Interesting to note that Frederik X has a cool nickname, stemming from his military service. Frederik is a Danish frogman. For those unfamiliar with the term and now picturing a bearded Dane in a frog suit like Super Mario…it’s not that. But also…kinda close? Frederik received elite naval training similar to what the US NAVY SEALS endure, and such graduates are often called “frogmen.” Anyway…during a training exercise, his diving suit sprung a hole and filled with water, which sunk right into both of the legs of his suit. Water is heavy…and diving suits are skin-tight. Frederik was only able to waddle around like a penguin in this condition, so his classmates named him “Pingo.” It stuck.

After we finished the tour, we saw the changing of the guard. It is billed heavily as a tourist attraction, and though we arrived about 20 minutes early, it was WAY too crowded to really enjoy. We watched the first few minutes to get the flavor of the ceremony before dropping out of the crowd to continue our day.

Josh: The guard is marched from their barracks about 1 km away at Rosenborgslot (castle), and they execute their duties with honor and professionalism while marching THROUGH traffic! Yes, they leave their barracks in formation and march through the streets to relieve their fellow guardsmen. If you’re driving in the area, and you get stuck behind them on their way to the palace/barracks…too bad for you. Also interesting: we witnessed that they are required to obey all traffic laws, including stopping at traffic lights, so as not to disturb too much traffic. No special treatment! Very Danish!

We took a walk through the city to Rosenborgslot and the attached King’s gardens (Kongens Have). if you remember our first from Friday, you’ll remember that we’ve been here before! The park was just as lovely the second time We cut through the park to find takeaway lunch at a local kebab place. We took our takeaway back to the park where we enjoyed a glorious picnic lunch in the shadows of a tree that sits in the metaphorical shadow of the nearby Rosenborg castle. It was awesome!

<Wayne’s World-like transition here, as the blog is turned back over to Josh>

We wound our way through the beautiful pleasure gardens surrounding the castle to kill off some time before our scheduled 3pm tour, and took some amazing pictures of pretty flowers and statues. There was a fire in Copenhagen in 1795, and the crown prince at the time cut off a portion of the southern side of the gardens to be used for house construction for the displaced people. The street formed by this sacrificial expansion is still known as Kronprinsensgade (Crown-Prince street).

At 3pm we took an amazing self guided tour through the 17th century renaissance castle. The interior of the building is simply DRIPPING with history: paintings, clocks, personal belongings, tapestries, thrones, porcelain, ivory, amber, gems, jewelry, and all kinds of other artifacts of significance to Danish cultural heritage.

There is one thing I have to point out. In the knights hall, there is a curious artifact, that perhaps is testimony to the concept of Danish humor, which I believe is best described as “campfire humor.” The artifact is a prank chair. Yes, an entire chair that is dedicated to an eloborate and embarrassing prank. This thing is engineered in such a brilliant way…really…my hat is off to these people! What does it do? Here we go:

1. When the victim sits down, the seat trumpets a tremendous fart! Already, we’re in epic-prank territory!

2. Two wooden staves emerge from underneath the arms of the chair, trapping the user on the chair. They simply are not able to get up with these staves over their legs!

3. When a ring on one side of the chair is then pulled, a tank of water, concealed in the bac of the chair, drains through pipes built into the arms of the chair. Those arms have emitters built into them, which direct the water to wet the seat.

4. A ring pull on the opposite side allows the tank to drain through pipes to the bottom of the chair, which soak the socks and shoes of the victim.

5. When the victim Is mercifully released from this prank chair, a final indignity is inflicted upon them as the seat trumpets another fart! Truly, a master stroke!

Let’s recap: the victim appears to let out a giant fart, wet themselves, gets stuck in a chair while they do it, and then let’s out another giant fart when they are released and everyone sees that they’ve wet themselves.

Amazing.

No one really knows where the chair came from or whether it REALLY belongs at Rosenborgslot. Really, it’s a sort of one-off display to amuse the crowd, but I think it’s amazing nonetheless to imagine a mischievous absolute ruler messing with high society types and knocking them down a few pegs!

Another cool thing: The Danish absolutist throne is guarded by three large silver lions that must be walked ariound in order to approach the King and Queen. While the monarchy has thrown off many of the trappings of their absolutist forebearers (crowns and dictatorship and such), the old tradition of the lions remains in one aspect. If a Danish monarch dies, the lions are moved from the throne room and placed around the casket to guard it. I thought that was pretty cool!

After completing the tour, we descended the castle stairs to the ground, exited and then entered the basement vault of the castle, where the royal treasures of Denmark are kept. The basement vault is filled with tremendously crafted items (some native to Denmark and others gifts). There is an entire room of amazing amber and ivory. The vault was once a kitchen and a wine cellar, so there are amazing bottles and barrels of vintage 17th century wine. There are weapons of all types and amazing clockwork contraptions for predicting the movement of the stars and eclipses. The climax of the entire vault, however, are the Danish Crown Jewels and Crown Regalia of the absolutist monarchs. There were stunning crowns, scepters, necklaces, goblets, orbs, and gems of all kinds, set into rings broaches and every other wearable item you can think of. There were gold-plated books, and the sword of state of Denmark. It was truly breathtaking - and not only because some tourist in obvious distress let off the nastiest fart we’ve ever smelled… in a freaking SEALED VAULT underground. I think the poor guard’s eyes were watering. I know mine were. And no…it wasn’t US. Imagine letting one off in the prettiest elevator you’ve ever been in. It’s still rude, and someone could have died! Or maybe it was the GUARD…evil…

After ascending from the vault and pushing the human methane stank out of our lungs, refilling them with air again, we hopped on the metro to get dinner in the meat packing district at this amazing BBQ place that was recommended to us by one of Jessi’s docs: Warpigs. The food was sublime, and the environment was PERFECT. The beer was wonderful, plentiful, quick, and there was key lime pie! It checked EVERY…SINGLE…BOX on our needs list for the day, and I’d be surprised if we did not wind up back there AT LEAST 1 more time, if not every night that we are within a 100 mile radius of Copenhagen.

After a wonderful meal, we hopped back on the metro to sit outside at a local brewpub called Proud Mary and write this blog! Thanks for tagging along! Tomorrow, we will be wrapping up Copenhagen with some remaining must-do’s. See you then!

A Visit with the Völva

Deep in a bog..

A mystic Viking seeress told us tales of the coming ragnarök

Today we paid a special visit to Denmark’s cultural and historical past at the Nationalmuseet Denmark (National Museum of Denmark). We spent the entire day, wandering the exhibits of this museum, and we still did not get to see everything (cue at least 15 people reading this complaining about how I read EVERY SIGN and placard in a museum). Look, folks, those important bits of information were printed out for a reason, and they are NOT going to read themselves! So cool it!

But also…I was better about not needing to read everything. I frequently found myself catching up to Jessi. This was not due to any lacking of quality or amount of reading material available in relation to the exhibits. In fact, both Jessi and I remarked that this is one of the very best history museums that we’ve ever visited! The summaries that accompanied each chronological section of every exhibit were supremely well written, provided fantastic information, and included references to specific “can’t miss it” objects located in the same room. Guys, the Danes have it down to a science!

The museum hosts exhibits about the history and cultural heritage of Denmark and all of its current and former territorial holdings. It also indirectly provides some history about its fellow Scandinavian neighbors. We ran out our time in the museum (they were closing by the time we finally left), but there is a super cool exhibit about the former Danish colonial territories and the negative impacts of colonization on them. Breezing through the exhibit on our way out of the wing, we noticed documentation of a city in India near Calcutta, Greenland, the former Danish West Indies (now the US Virgin Islands), and the Faroe Islands. We are giving serious thought to going back to the museum to finish that exhibit when we return back to Copenhagen at the end of our trip.

Things of a historical nature

The museum chronicles the happenings in Denmark from the Stone Age through the modern era, and contains at least two 9,000 year old dog turds. Yeah…not making that up. But also, that’s freaking cool! Now, if you own a dog, please don’t go leaving their droppings lay about wherever they are…dropped…in hopes that your dog’s business is preserved into the year 11,024. Please and thank you! By then we will probably just be getting around to making efficient and easy-to-open pickle jars or fixing the damage to our planet that pickle jars probably did.

How do we know about life and dog turds in the Nordic regions that long ago? Well it turns out that the graves and methods of goods-sacrifice in the region were absolutely PERFECT for preservation. That preservation was an art perfected further over the succeeding ages. Here’s something that blew my mind. Once the ice age had ended and the glaciers that covered most of Northern Europe had receded to the point that the land became habitable, tribes of people who made their way north to settle would SACRIFICE….objects. Yes you read that right! That shiny stone axe you have? The gods want it. Accept the pain it brings you to part with it, and use the next one you made. I guess it spurs and drives the iterative process of invention and product evolution? Can you imagine the stone age sales and marketing teams back then? Probably weren’t much different than today. Not much evolution in that sector, if you ask me. But supply and demand is a thing. You have it, the gods want it, and you want that crop to grow.

Anyway, here’s the process by which you sacrifice these things to the gods from the Stone Age through to the Bronze Age:

1. You have the perfect weather and soil conditions to preserve stone/bone etc.

2. You have access to a lake. (Most any clear idyllic glacial lake will do)

3. You throw all your sacrificial shit into the ground or into a lake. If in the ground, bury it, peat side down, forming layers of minerals that perfectly seal your items in an oxygen free state (no decay).

4. Special note, this also applies to bodies that you might dispose of in a bog or bury in a barrow (small man-made hill with multi-tiered graves)

One of the most amazing things I learned today was about how the Danes dealt with the Romans, and how we are able to directly confirm Roman invasions of the territories in Denmark in the Iron Age. Back then, the scene was still tribal. The tribes would annihilate the units of these invading Roman armies, strip the soldiers of all their belongings, and then bury all their ships and weapons as sacrifices. “Thanks for helping us to appease our gods a bring the good crops, Dooficus!” Romans? What Romans? I jest about the nature of the weapons and goods sacrifices, but from the massive wealth of artifacts (still being found by the way), it really seemed like these tribal peoples just really wanted those pesky Romans to disappear. Now, the Romans did have their successes in the region. After all, they did extend their influence deep into Europe through force, but they also used a more clever tactic. They made friends and alliances. By working with the leaders of the tribes to provide them with safe trade along the Elbe River and other major trade routes in the region, they were able to put into place many great Danish Magnate Families, who closely allied with them.

I took a bunch of pictures of interesting stone/bone/bronze/iron axes, tools swords, jewelry, coinage, beads, saddles, animal skeletons, and other grave goods/sacrifices preserved in the musueum, and they are still being unearthed in Denmark today. In fact, there is a small exhibit about amateur metal detectorists, who recover these things in the field. There are laws in Denmark requiring folks to hand over objects of historical and cultural importance when found. They even receive awards for their finds, which are taken by archeology teams and evaluated. There are stories of people finding hoardes of ancient coins in fields, tree-trunk coffins in bogs, and randomly, a horned helmet just sticking up out of the ground that tripped a young woman! What a unique way to turn the tables on the concept of archeology as a walled profession! Of course there are also laws that regulate the care that needs to be taken when searching for artifacts, and there are also regulations about where it can be done, when you should notify authorities, etc. In essence, it creates an army of “professional amateurs.”

The Völva

Jessi and I took a walk through the amazing exhibit about Viking mysticism and the female Viking seeresses, called völvas (vool-vas). They were the oracles of the Viking people, performing magic and engaged in a ritual known as the seid. This ritual involved group singing and potentially the consumption of poisonous herbs, and it induced an altered state in the völva, by which she could converse with he spirit world. She could then do magic and see the future. This power was accorded to only the females in the culture. Even the great god Odin, father of the pantheon of Norse gods had to seek out a völva for counsel if he wanted to see into the future.

The exhibit was a guided interactive experience with amazing and dramatic sets, shows, voice acting, and effects! It was truly the best interpretive exhibit that I’ve ever seen. You wore a headset that activated audio scenes according to your location in the exhibit. The audio völva bid you to follow deeper into the next scene as you are immersed into Norse mythology. The climax was an incredible multimedia experience with mirrors and projectors, in which the völva presents her vision of the coming of ragnarõck (the Viking apocalypse tale). I could sit here and write for 3-4 hours about the fascinating stuff that was in this exhibit, but here are some of the highlights:

• Vikings are not a “people” per se. Viking is a job. The word referred to a warrior or trader. It referred to someone in the Nordic culture who went away raiding or trading to bring stuff back to their families and tribe. Because they introduced themselves to other Europeans as Vikings (their job title), the name sort of stuck. It began to be broadly applied to tribesman who were simple farmers and warriors/traders alike by other Europeans of the time. So forgive me for the rest of this post, as I refer to them as Vikings and as “Viking culture”

• Thor’s hammer is a symbol of fertility and was exclusively worn by women! Take what you will from that.

• There are many cool stories about völvas doing magic for tribes in exchange for pay. They had elaborate and expensive ceremonial regalia, often cobbled from seized loot paid to them (bent foreign coins and other objects) as well as rich local wealth like amber beads. They were identified by the carrying of rods (magic rods or staffs). They performed their magic (or were thought to have spiritual position through) using raised seats or chairs, which often appeared as chair-shaped beads or pendants. It may be the case that there is more in symbols to this rather than actual seats. They funded these pieces of regalia with gifts for their magic and counsel. One story told of a usurper King, who needed a völva to find the family of the former King. They were in hiding, and they posed a great danger to his legitimacy, while they were alive. You know, so he REALLY needed to end that line completely. He paid her handsomely, and she called all of the tribe together for a feast. She was raised above the tribe and began her magic. She stated that the old King’s kin were hiding near the fire. They were. Suddenly a gold ring was thrown to the völva. She caught it and stated that everything she said was a lie. She then predicted that the true successor king would return and restore the line. Supposedly, that’s exactly what happened. Another story involved a queen who was also a völva and could do magic. She liked younger men. She brought a traveling young man (with a fiancé back home) to her bedroom under the auspices that she would help him get the inheritance he was travelling to seek. She locked him in and some days/weeks later she asked him if he had a betrothed back home. I hope she at least offered him a glass of water or a Gatorade too! He lied to her and she knew it by her magic. She kissed him and said that she had now cursed him to lose his beloved when he returned home. He returned home and married his beloved, but she immediately found grounds for divorce. After the marriage ceremony, she had found that his penis was suddenly too big for making an heir since he had come back. The physics just were… not possible. And so she was divorced from him

• The völvas survived into the christian era of the Danish people, and were thought to have been a secondary spiritual advisors for long after christianity had spread its tendrils into the Viking people. Though, they were gradually phased out, and the profession died a slow death.

One last thing. In the medieval era exhibit, there was an artifact that I found pretty neat. As most medieval exhibits do, they had quite a few depictions of the Christian Jesus character being crucified. One of those artifacts appeared into in part, and it caught our eyes. It was a half-head! Only the right half of his head! It was being chopped up to be used as firewood, when a priceless solid gold reliquary fell out of a cavity that was hidden inside! That cross reliquary is also on display nearby, and it was rumored to have a splinter of the “true cross” in it. So many reliquaries of the time pulled that old shtick, though.

What else to say? There are so many more things to talk about in this museum, but I’ll never be able to cover it all AND be able to sleep a respectable amount of time tonight. So the only way to really solve this is….you’re going to have to come here and check it out! Highly recommended!

After the museum, Jessi and I were pretty tired. We took a quick break at the hotel, and then went down past Radhuspladsen (City Hall) to Strøget (a pedestrian shopping street). We walked along he winding road passed the shops and to our intended dinner destination at the rooftop of the Illlum department store. Unfortunately, we wound up at the wrong restaurant for the experience that we were seeking, but we made the best of it, and learned a thing or two about making decisions while tired….and planning that better.

After some ice cream on the way home to the hotel, here we are. All caught up!

Enjoy the pictures! Tomorrow is supposed to be Castle-palooza! Hopefully things go to plan! You’ll find out right after we do! :-)

What takes the Cakenhagen in Copenhagen

A Night in Tivoli Gardens

After a day of rollercoasters, rides, parades, pastry and coffee!

Today was another amazing day in Copenhagen! We woke up early to make our breakfast reservation for 8:30 at the breakfast restaurant (yes they have a special restaurant for breakfast). The Square Hotel provides an amazing breakfast spread buffet some amazing options like build your own granola bowls (all kinds of toppings and yogurts) to the lunch meats and delicious breads (yes, for breakfast - hello again, German-style breakfast) to gorgeously soft scrambled eggs with sausages and bacon and much more. We fueled up for the day and made our way out into the wild that is the city today. Copenhagen pride is still going, and man is it going hard! Our hotel is situated directly on the City Hall Square (Radhuspladsen ‘Rah-d-hoos-plass’), which is the CENTER of all pride festivities. Today we wove our way around the wreckage of last night’s concert to check out Copenhagen’s amazing city hall. After that, we sauntered over to the nearby Tivoli Gardens amusement park, exited to view the pride parade, and re-entered Tivoli Gardens for more rides and beautiful lights!

Copenhagen’s City Hall

We walked into the hall and immediately knew that we were in over our heads. There is so much thoughtful detail in the architecture and the decoration of the building. The building was finished in 1905 and has contains many different styles of architecture on the inside. We quickly got ourselves on the guided tour. It was a good choice too, because the guide was AWESOME and very funny.

Let’s take you through a summary of the tour so you have a little detail for the pictures that I’ll be uploading. On the front exterior facade of the hall, stands Bishop Absalon, the credited founder of Copenhagen. He built a fortress on the islet of Slotsholmen (where the government is now quartered) to protect the port town from attack by the German Hanseatic League. Gradually the city took shape and expanded, due to its importance, being located on the Sound between the North Sea and the Baltic Sea as a major port.

There were other city halls before this one; however, the one we toured today is the largest city hall in Copenhagen’s history. Though it was finished in 1905, the hall bears witness to and hosts the vast history of the city. It does so by engraving all of the city’s major historical events across the walls in the great hall, and it hosts an archive of all of its own historical documents. Citizens may come and research those documents in the archive in order to learn more about the history of their city.

The first thing that we did on the tour was to walk outside. The guide pointed out all the couples and their families outside, who were waiting to be married! He not so sheepishly boasted that Copenhagen is responsible for over 6000 weddings every year, no matter who you are or who you love. Marriage seekers need only to complete the proper paperwork, go into the hall to the designated office on one side of the building, Then they come out the other side married and eager to celebrate with their close friends and family. We noted throughout the morning that there was, indeed, a steady line of people getting married right there and right then.

The tour progressed inside to the hall’s foyer. On 2 columns, posted on either side of the inner door, are carved two cobra snakes. They sit on the columns guarding the door to the grand hall, and they are meant to imply that they will strike at anyone who comes to this hall with evil intent. Above this well protected door is a stunning relief carving of the first head mayor of Copenhagen and citizens. It was explained that all of the official action and ruling of the citizenry was traditionally done outside and never inside. Although this has changed, there are some cool references to that outdoor tradition later on.

When you enter the great hall, you immediately notice a change in style and area. The small doors cast you into a wide open grand hall with a large windowed ceiling. This ceiling was actually installed much later, and the original hall was open-air. Denmark famously has rainy and cloudy weather, so the hall was eventually closed. The far wall of the hall is done in an Italian style with two levels of windows looking into the hall. The City council is housed on the second floor, and the offices of the various city departments and the city archive are on the first floor. The hall has a tremendous amount of imagery referencing water, elements, fauna, flora, and historical events. One of the particularly neat things was an archway, the “Wheat Gate,” leading to the “Golden Stairs.” This archway depicts a field of wheat in stone relief, and hiding amongst the wheat are animals as elemental representations. There is a lizard for fire, a bird for air, a rat for the land, and a frog for the water.

The referenced “Golden Stairs” lead upstairs to the city council’s anteroom and plenary room. On the stairs, on both sides of the building, are carved various depictions of citizens engaged in their professions. There are paintings of citizens on the stairwells, and there are busts of people faces everywhere. They are always watching you from the walls and the ceilings wherever you go in the building. This reminds officials and fellow citizens that the city hall is a place for ALL citizens, and that there are always people watching. The golden stairs have gold gilded railings along a beautiful marble stairwell.

On the other side of the hall are the “wooden stairs,” an elegant wooden stairwell with paintings of the sea-faring and land-faring aspects of Copenhagen, tying together its two important themes in history as port and bountiful agricultural center. When the Queen of Denmark would visit, she was required to use the wooden stairs to traverse the building. This is a cool tradition, and it is to illustrate humility and understanding that this is the peoples’ house, and it does not belong to the queen.

The tour guide led us through the plenary room, where he gave us a pretty good rendition of his own interpretation of representative democracy. He explained the basic concepts of elections, political parties, and representation. He even gave us quite the amazing demonstration of plenary process and debate, as he stood in the center of the plenary room and said, “this is where they stand up in front of everyone else and go blah blah blah blah!” Given my own work experience in a foreign legislature, I could not think of a more accurate description. Well done, sir. Well done. I shall heretofore refer to this moment fondly as my first Danish civics course!

OK a few more cool things before I wrap this up. The keys that this man used to get into each locked door were neat. The bitting on these old iron keys was either a castle or three long bits, representing the 3 towers of the Copenhagen seal. With the castle key, he took us on a tour of a special room that is used for the reception of Copenhagen’s honored guests! The room is modeled after a sea-faring ship, with railings on both sides, as if you were standing on the main deck. All around the ceiling are the coats of arms of the various cities of Denmark with a special wall for its territories, Greenland, Faroe Islands, and the former Danish West Indies (today the US Virgin Islands). On this wall are two gold gilded walrus skulls with tusks, and a peculiar door. This door leads out to the exterior balcony on the front of City Hall. Our tour guide does not have a key to that door and has never been on that balcony. Only very important people like the queen or sports champions (like a recent international Handball champion) are presented to the people on that balcony. It is only for those special occasions when someone very important to the city or the nation os presented to the other citizens of the city/country. He showed us a cool video that he took on his phone of that handball champion being presented to the city from the window next to the balcony. There were massive crowds in the square cheering. It was really cool!

The tour having ended, Jessi and I milled around the place taking more pictures. We probably could have stayed there all day, but it was time to go explore…

Tivoli Gardens

Tivoli Gardens is a garden amusement park in the middle of the biggest city and capital of Denmark. Think of Hershey Park or Kings Dominion, or one of the better Six Flags condensed into the space of two or three full city blocks. There are rollercoasters, carnival rides, food joints, beer, wine, stages for the arts, stages for live music shows, and incredible gardens to enjoy. This park was one of the biggest reasons for us coming to Copenhagen. We wanted to come here and ride rollercoasters, and ride we did.

Tivoli Gardens is the third oldest operating amusement park in the world. It’s named after the Tivoli gardens in Paris, which are named for Tivoli in Rome. Did you follow that? Bah! What does it matter! There was food and fun and plenty of it. Jessi and I rode the Daemon rollercoaster, a delightful above-track steel coaster with a large loop. We rode a super high swings ride, and some spinny carnival rides until we were dizzy. We grabbed some lunch in the nearby Tivoli food hall, which hosts a tremendous assortment of cafe and imbiss options in styles from all over the world. There was everything from sourdough pizza and West African spicy to sushi, traditional Danish Smørrebrød and English brewpubs. We left the park to eat some delightful Smørrebrød (open faced sandwiches) and wandered off to watch the pride parade nearby back at the city hall!

The parade was off-the-hooks packed with all kinds, and it was amazing. There isn’t really a whole lot to say about it except that the atmosphere was wonderfully accommodative and accepting of all peoples and it was PACKED. Lots of people have descended onto Copenhagen for this event, and the party continues into one final night! Once Jessi and I had taken some cool pictures and gotten the vibe of the crowd, we decided to head back to our original mission of the day: Tivoli Gardens. We re-entered the park through the food hall and spent the afternoon eating junk food, walking through the gardens, and riding more rides. It was so much fun. We had a coffee on the field in front of the concert stage and watched the sun go down slowly. Then we meandered around the park as all the decorative lights came on and took some really cool photos of all the features we had seen earlier in the day all lit up. In particular, where are paper lamps and a dragon as well as exotic buildings in the style of Arabian architecture.

Now is the part where I backtrack a bit to the title of our blog entry today. Anyone who knows Jessi, knows about her “thing” for cake of late. Often I’ll make a special trip to the store to pick up some ingredient that I forgot for our dinner, and she will ask, “did you get cake?” This is as though I’m supposed to think of this every time I go to the store. Well…anyway…no sooner had we gotten through the gates of Tivoli Gardens in the morning, Jessi sees a cake and pastry shop. Surprise! That’s where we are going! NOW! The name? You can’t make this up…”Cakenhagen.” Yup. It has been a topic of conversation all day. Whether we should buy expensive admission tickets just to go to Cakenhagen in the park. Luckily on our way back to the hotel, we noticed that Cakenhagen has a shop just outside the park, which is accessible to anyone. Guess where we will be going for a snack over the next few days while we are in Copenhagen….or..over the next few years as Jessi applies for citizenship and starts googling for apartments closest to Cakenhagen?

Tomorrow, the city will be alive with an Iron Man Triathlon, taking place all over. We are planning on making it a museum day. If folks are out running/swimming/biking (or watching those activities) they aren’t crowding the museums right? We’ll see!

Thanks for following along with us…ok now here are the PICTURES!!

Welcome to Denmark!

It’s Day # 1

And we’re NOT 21…anymore…

I think it’s safe to say that we bit off a bit more than we could chew today, but we’re having a blast! Our total travel time was about 18 hours, when adding up all the time waiting in airports. We left our house in Alexandria yesterday morning, boarded our Air Canada flight to Montreal, sat there for 7 hours, and then flew first class to Copenhagen. Poor Jessi didn’t get any sleep in our lay-flat seats on the plane, but I was able to get a solid 3 hours. We arrived bleary-eyed and excited to Copenhagen airport at about 7 AM local time and caught the metro into the city. We were VERY early to the hotel, and there were no early check-ins available, but they were kind enough to stow our bags.

Some things happening in Copenhagen this week: Copenhagen PRIDE and an Iron Man Triathlon! The hotels are packed. The streets are plastered with pride flags (awesome), and book stores are decked-out, featuring related literature and swag. Folks were walking into the hotel with massive bike-shaped bags over their shoulders for the Iron Man Triathlon, and we watched in awe as folks slung their bikes (in these bags) over their shoulders and walked off to the tiny elevators. Some laws of physics were manipulated for sure!

Unladen of our bags, we decided to take a quick Huffowicz tour of the city. No Huffowicz tour comes at a distance of less than 6 miles, and so we wandered the streets, bumping into many of the various sights we came here to see!

The first thing we found was the main gate to Tivoli Gardens, the third oldest amusement park in the world (since 1843)! We will be spending a whole day there on this trip, riding roller coasters and enjoying the gardens.

We also found one of about 3 LEGO stores that we have bumped into so far! LEGO is Danish, if you didn’t know, and also the plural of LEGO is…LEGO. One of the stores had a particularly cool setup with a model of the Roman Colosseum and dioramas of seemingly most of the Olympic sport events surrounding it!

Then we walked into town a bit and found ourselves at the seat of the Danish government at Slotsholmen, where we got our first glimpse of Christianborgslot. It is only building in the world to host all of its country’s branches of government! We are planning to come back and tour it.

Then we wound our way up the round tower (Rundetaarn). When I say this, I mean that we both wound our way up TO the location of the tower, and then we WOUND our way UP the actual tower! The Rundetaarn was founded in the 1650s and was built by the Danish King Christian IV. The purpose of the tower is as an observatory, and it houses a really cool equestrian staircase all the way to the top! Basically, the tower is built like a giant corkscrew, so that Christian IV could ride his horses up to the observatory at the top! Astronomy was a huge deal in the late 17th and early 18th centuries, as nations competed to make discoveries about astronomical phenomenon that could help with navigation. There is an amazing MOVING heliocentric map of the solar system hung near the top of the tower. I am unclear on whether it still moves or is accurate, but it was quite a thing to behold. One observation I made was that it contains 6 planets (out to Saturn). Neptune and Uranus are later discoveries, although not by terribly much (late 18th century). Tzar Peter the Great of Russia is reported to have ridden by horse to the top of the tower with his wife Catherine I, who reportedly rode behind him in a carriage. The tower offers stunning views of the city from the top! It gave us a great orientation of where everything in the city is located, and it was also a great preview of things to come this week! On our way up the tower, we were able to get a glimpse of Trinity Church, which is actually connected to the tower. There was an exhibit on the way up in the tower path that contains the church’s bell loft. In that loft is the removed geocentric version of the solar system map (or possibly a recreation). We still kind of think that we’re the center of the universe, though, don’t we?

We were absolutely exhausted, but our wanderlust was not yet slaked. We walked a short distance to Kongenshave (King’s Garden) at Rosenborgslot. It’s a beautiful garden park in front of one of Denmark’s amazingly beautiful palaces. The park is shaded with lines of Linden trees, under which we took shelter from the pretty constant rain. There are fountains and statues in the park. We have vowed to return to explore them in full. Jessi took some bird photos and added some new feathered-friends to her lifetime birding records!

After all that, we weaved our way through the city’s winding streets back to our hotel, begging for a (still) early check-in. Regrettably, with the city so full, this was not possible, but we were able to sit in the lobby and wait until we could get a room (more importantly a bed to sleep). We’re pretty wiped out, but we are excited about tomorrow! There is a huge PRIDE parade happening tomorrow! We might attend that or we might take advantage of the crowd concentration elsewhere and go to Tivoli for the day. We’re playing this by ear and being flexible. Truthfully, I’m not 100% sure we’ll be able to fit it all into this trip! I’m getting the impression that we’re going to need to come back already! The city is alive and bustling. There are so many amazing things to do and see. We will be spending a few more days here in Copenhagen before moving in-land a bit and then up to Sweden.

As I write this entry, our hotel window is open, and the pride concert is happening at Radhuspladsen right next to us. So I’ve had an amazing soundtrack of dance music, Whitney Houston, soaring rock ballads, and a cheering crowd helping me to write this entry for you all. I have stopped a few times to politely acknowledge the applause. These people really like it when you write about their country I guess. The music stops, and then there are wild screams and cheers…obviously for me….

I hope You’ve enjoyed this FIRST slice of our trip. We are definitely enjoying ourselves so far! We’ll try and keep updating this blog daily in the afternoon/evening US Eastern time.

Prepping for a tour through Denmark and Sweden

Our Next Big Trip…

Team Huffowicz is, once again, heading out into the wild blue yonder! This time, we will be travelling through Denmark and Sweden, via train (mostly). We are planning some small bike trips along the way to view some amazing things that are further afield in metro-areas. We are super excited about the opportunity to experience the Danish culture, language, people, history, and majestic natural beauty.

Our bags are partially packed. Our hotel reservations are made. We bought eSims for our phones, we have some train schedules set, and we know many things that we want to go see!

Highlights of the trip will include:

• Stunning Castles, Palaces, and Cathedrals

• Tivoli Gardens amusement park

• Viking Boat Museum

• Beautiful Gardens and Parks

• Cool Museums

• Amazing Food

Follow along in the coming two weeks with us as we discover these two Scandinavian countries!