These three lions…
are not lyin’. If you try to approach the throne with the wrong intentions, you’re going to regret it!
Today you’re getting a Josh & Jessi combo post. What a treat! What a rarity! Our day was made amazing by an unsually sunny, bright, warm day in Copenhagen! The high temperature today was around 70* F and there were hardly any clouds and not a drop of rain! Everyone (citizens and tourists alike) were out to enjoy the beautiful weather. We are so lucky to get to experience such a gorgeous day in this lovely city. Come to think of it, with exception to our first day, every day has been amazing weather. Denmark is well known as a rainy and cold place.
That said, we started slowly because we decided to sleep late this morning! With an 8 a.m. wake up call (instead of our usual 6 a.m.), we didn’t leave the hotel/nearby coffee shop until just after 10 a.m. Speaking of coffee….. have we mentioned the proliferation of the “Espresso Cafe” here Copenhagen yet? They are absolutely everywhere and they are amazing. It’s like the Danish (Nordic?) cousin of Starbucks, but better. Josh’s favorite is an extra-shot latte and Jessi’s is an extra-shot vanilla oat milk latte. Delicious and a great way to start any day…. Or have an afternoon snack… or a nightcap. Really, just good any time of the day.
Anyway, back to our day! Today was castle-palooza! We toured two castles today - Amalienborg and Rosenborg. Both of which at some point doubled as royal residences making them also palaces! (Josh is going to correct this, I’m sure. His love of pedantry is part of what I find so lovable about him.) Moving on….
Hi…Josh here…um actually castles are built for protection, and palaces are built for comfort in residence. Rosenborgslot is a castle with a moat around it and some protective features. It kind of straddles the line between the two without any noted additional defensive features. I argue that the moat technically qualifies it as a castle. Amalienborg is 4 individual palace buildings in a palace complex. It rests on Amalienborgpladse in 4 distinct buildings, having similar architecture. They were built to house the Danish Royal Family comfortably here in the heart of Copenhagen. These buildings were not necessarily built for protection AND the ceremonial protection of the building is provided by a palace guard battalion.
At Amalienborgslot, we got to see a special exhibition (limited time, ending September 8, 2024) honoring the newly crowned Danish King Frederik X. It was a really great exhibit, showcasing the push/pull of modern life on a child born into a royal family. I (Jessi) really loved the section of the exhibit examining the role of the press (Danish and international) in Frederick’s life and journey to adulthood. I recently finished “Spare” by Prince Harry and found some troubling similarities in the two stories.
Josh: Interesting to note that Frederik X has a cool nickname, stemming from his military service. Frederik is a Danish frogman. For those unfamiliar with the term and now picturing a bearded Dane in a frog suit like Super Mario…it’s not that. But also…kinda close? Frederik received elite naval training similar to what the US NAVY SEALS endure, and such graduates are often called “frogmen.” Anyway…during a training exercise, his diving suit sprung a hole and filled with water, which sunk right into both of the legs of his suit. Water is heavy…and diving suits are skin-tight. Frederik was only able to waddle around like a penguin in this condition, so his classmates named him “Pingo.” It stuck.
After we finished the tour, we saw the changing of the guard. It is billed heavily as a tourist attraction, and though we arrived about 20 minutes early, it was WAY too crowded to really enjoy. We watched the first few minutes to get the flavor of the ceremony before dropping out of the crowd to continue our day.
Josh: The guard is marched from their barracks about 1 km away at Rosenborgslot (castle), and they execute their duties with honor and professionalism while marching THROUGH traffic! Yes, they leave their barracks in formation and march through the streets to relieve their fellow guardsmen. If you’re driving in the area, and you get stuck behind them on their way to the palace/barracks…too bad for you. Also interesting: we witnessed that they are required to obey all traffic laws, including stopping at traffic lights, so as not to disturb too much traffic. No special treatment! Very Danish!
We took a walk through the city to Rosenborgslot and the attached King’s gardens (Kongens Have). if you remember our first from Friday, you’ll remember that we’ve been here before! The park was just as lovely the second time We cut through the park to find takeaway lunch at a local kebab place. We took our takeaway back to the park where we enjoyed a glorious picnic lunch in the shadows of a tree that sits in the metaphorical shadow of the nearby Rosenborg castle. It was awesome!
<Wayne’s World-like transition here, as the blog is turned back over to Josh>
We wound our way through the beautiful pleasure gardens surrounding the castle to kill off some time before our scheduled 3pm tour, and took some amazing pictures of pretty flowers and statues. There was a fire in Copenhagen in 1795, and the crown prince at the time cut off a portion of the southern side of the gardens to be used for house construction for the displaced people. The street formed by this sacrificial expansion is still known as Kronprinsensgade (Crown-Prince street).
At 3pm we took an amazing self guided tour through the 17th century renaissance castle. The interior of the building is simply DRIPPING with history: paintings, clocks, personal belongings, tapestries, thrones, porcelain, ivory, amber, gems, jewelry, and all kinds of other artifacts of significance to Danish cultural heritage.
There is one thing I have to point out. In the knights hall, there is a curious artifact, that perhaps is testimony to the concept of Danish humor, which I believe is best described as “campfire humor.” The artifact is a prank chair. Yes, an entire chair that is dedicated to an eloborate and embarrassing prank. This thing is engineered in such a brilliant way…really…my hat is off to these people! What does it do? Here we go:
When the victim sits down, the seat trumpets a tremendous fart! Already, we’re in epic-prank territory!
Two wooden staves emerge from underneath the arms of the chair, trapping the user on the chair. They simply are not able to get up with these staves over their legs!
When a ring on one side of the chair is then pulled, a tank of water, concealed in the bac of the chair, drains through pipes built into the arms of the chair. Those arms have emitters built into them, which direct the water to wet the seat.
A ring pull on the opposite side allows the tank to drain through pipes to the bottom of the chair, which soak the socks and shoes of the victim.
When the victim Is mercifully released from this prank chair, a final indignity is inflicted upon them as the seat trumpets another fart! Truly, a master stroke!
Let’s recap: the victim appears to let out a giant fart, wet themselves, gets stuck in a chair while they do it, and then let’s out another giant fart when they are released and everyone sees that they’ve wet themselves.
Amazing.
No one really knows where the chair came from or whether it REALLY belongs at Rosenborgslot. Really, it’s a sort of one-off display to amuse the crowd, but I think it’s amazing nonetheless to imagine a mischievous absolute ruler messing with high society types and knocking them down a few pegs!
Another cool thing: The Danish absolutist throne is guarded by three large silver lions that must be walked ariound in order to approach the King and Queen. While the monarchy has thrown off many of the trappings of their absolutist forebearers (crowns and dictatorship and such), the old tradition of the lions remains in one aspect. If a Danish monarch dies, the lions are moved from the throne room and placed around the casket to guard it. I thought that was pretty cool!
After completing the tour, we descended the castle stairs to the ground, exited and then entered the basement vault of the castle, where the royal treasures of Denmark are kept. The basement vault is filled with tremendously crafted items (some native to Denmark and others gifts). There is an entire room of amazing amber and ivory. The vault was once a kitchen and a wine cellar, so there are amazing bottles and barrels of vintage 17th century wine. There are weapons of all types and amazing clockwork contraptions for predicting the movement of the stars and eclipses. The climax of the entire vault, however, are the Danish Crown Jewels and Crown Regalia of the absolutist monarchs. There were stunning crowns, scepters, necklaces, goblets, orbs, and gems of all kinds, set into rings broaches and every other wearable item you can think of. There were gold-plated books, and the sword of state of Denmark. It was truly breathtaking - and not only because some tourist in obvious distress let off the nastiest fart we’ve ever smelled… in a freaking SEALED VAULT underground. I think the poor guard’s eyes were watering. I know mine were. And no…it wasn’t US. Imagine letting one off in the prettiest elevator you’ve ever been in. It’s still rude, and someone could have died! Or maybe it was the GUARD…evil…
After ascending from the vault and pushing the human methane stank out of our lungs, refilling them with air again, we hopped on the metro to get dinner in the meat packing district at this amazing BBQ place that was recommended to us by one of Jessi’s docs: Warpigs. The food was sublime, and the environment was PERFECT. The beer was wonderful, plentiful, quick, and there was key lime pie! It checked EVERY…SINGLE…BOX on our needs list for the day, and I’d be surprised if we did not wind up back there AT LEAST 1 more time, if not every night that we are within a 100 mile radius of Copenhagen.
After a wonderful meal, we hopped back on the metro to sit outside at a local brewpub called Proud Mary and write this blog! Thanks for tagging along! Tomorrow, we will be wrapping up Copenhagen with some remaining must-do’s. See you then!
